The Confidence Gap - Why returning to work feels harder than it should (And what to do about it)!

I always thought confidence was something you either had or you didn’t.

For years, I stood in front of rooms full of people, leading meetings, training teams, and making decisions that shaped businesses. Speaking up wasn’t something I struggled with, it was part of my job.

And then, after taking a career break, something shifted.

I found myself overthinking emails. Hesitating before sharing my opinion. Questioning whether I was still good enough.

The irony? I was the same person. The same experience, the same skill set. And yet, the moment I thought about stepping back into the workforce, I felt like a fraud in my own career. Sound familiar? If it does, let me tell you, you’re not alone.

Why Does a Career Break Make Us Doubt Ourselves?

We hear a lot about the “confidence gap” between men and women, but what doesn’t get talked about enough is the confidence crash many women experience after stepping away from work.

• We start to feel disconnected from the industry we once knew inside out.

• We assume we’ve fallen behind on skills, even if we haven’t.

• We feel like we have to justify why we took time off - as if caregiving, personal growth, or simply needing a break weren’t valid reasons.

The truth is, our capabilities don’t disappear just because we’ve been away. But when we spend years outside of the workforce, surrounded by conversations that don’t revolve around boardrooms, KPIs, or deadlines, we start to believe a lie:

"Maybe I’m not as good as I used to be."

How Do We Get Past This?

I won’t tell you to “just be confident.” If only it were that easy, right? Instead, here’s what actually helps:

1. Start Acknowledging Your Skills (Yes, the Ones You Gained During Your Break!).

You didn’t just “pause” your career, you were still managing, problem-solving, adapting. Whether you were raising children, supporting a family business, freelancing, or simply figuring out your next steps, you were still developing skills.

• Negotiation? (Try getting a toddler to put their shoes on.)

• Crisis management? (Ever had a flight canceled with kids in tow?)

• Project management? (Running a household, planning, budgeting - sound familiar?)

These aren’t small things, they’re real-world skills that translate into leadership, adaptability, and problem-solving at work.

2. Rewrite Your Career Narrative

A gap on your CV doesn’t define you. What does? How you tell your story.

Instead of,"I’ve been out of work for five years, and I’m trying to get back into it,"try,"After a career break, I’m excited to bring my leadership, organizational, and communication skills back into the workforce." One sounds apologetic. The other sounds empowered.

3. Surround Yourself with the Right People

Confidence isn’t just something we build alone, it’s something we borrow from others when we need it. Whether it’s a mentor, a supportive friend, or a community like RETURNready, being around people who see your potential reminds you of your own worth.

4. Take Action (Even If You Don’t Feel Ready)

Confidence isn’t what makes us take action. Action is what builds confidence. Apply for that job. Reach out for that connection. Sign up for that workshop. The more we put ourselves out there, the more we prove to ourselves that we are more than capable.

Your Career Didn’t End - It Evolved

If you’re feeling stuck, unsure, or like your career break has erased your value, let me remind you of this: You are not starting over. You are starting with experience.

And that? That’s a powerful place to begin.